I Want To Grow Up.

Growing old is mandatory while growing up is optional.

I know I can't force someone to grow up emotionally and mentally just to sympathize with me to be a so-called-matured-lass.

I mean, I want to be matured enough to handle things on my own, to accept things and be able to adapt to it especially in terms of the society's norms and the nature of every individual I will encounter.

But how can I do it if I'm surrounded by people who won't let go of their little planet and step into the reality of this cruel world?

I'm talking about my childhood friend.

She thinks she knows everything about life.
But the truth is, she doesn't. She won't even accept how the people around her change so rapidly (especially regarding on boys). Yea, about having boyfriends?(She is soOo against that.) But it's not just all about boys, about secrets, girl talks and other stuff. I think she's too immature to handle things like that.

Really, she treats me as her bestfriend and vice-versa. But I've realized that it's worthless to call her my bestfriend when I can't open serious things to her.

We just call ourselves BESTFRIENDS when we're happy. I feel useful to her when she needs someone to talk to, someone to be her laughing buddy and someone to treat her when she's craving for some food.

I'm not counting the money I spent on you nor am I bragging about what I did for you. It's just that for one honest statement that I said, you ruined the moment and acted like you were the victim. It's not that I did something brutal to you because I didn't.

You know me better than others. I fondly believe in the saying DO UNTO OTHERS AS YOU WANT OTHERS TO DO UNTO YOU. I am not a mean person unless you show me your bad side. But I can be your nightmare when I get evilish. "Masama akong magalit at lalong masama akong kalabanin." You know what I can do when I'm all about revenge.

I don't know how and when this wrangle would end, but for now, we have to sober up first before deciding to face each other. 'Cause I don't want to be pretentious or act like an angel to please you.

Well I hope you would learn your own lesson and hope that you would respect my own outlook in life even if you really can't accept it. Like what I said, we're not precisely the same. We have differences.

I want to be me. I want to grow up in my own way. In the way where there is no one like you clouding up my mind.

Wish me luck. I wish you luck too. Toodles.